How to live alone: 8 tips to get used to living by yourself
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, CDCES, MBA
Living alone for the first time or again after a divorce? Learn the benefits of living alone and how to live alone happily and embrace your next chapter.
Many people live alone at different stages of their life, whether it's their first venture into independence after a significant life change like a divorce or simply a personal choice. Living alone can bring both challenges and opportunities that require a range of skills, from managing daily tasks and finances to ensuring emotional wellbeing. When it comes to living alone successfully, it’s important to consider not only the practical aspects but also the emotions that can come along with it.
Learning how to live alone
When you start living by yourself, the first challenge you might face is relying on yourself for daily tasks. This might include budgeting, maintaining your home, grocery shopping, and cooking, which can be new responsibilities if you've previously shared them with roommates or partners.
Beyond the practicalities, living alone also requires emotional adjustment. It's normal to experience a range of feelings when you're first on your own. You may feel excitement about the new freedom and space, but you might also have feelings of loneliness or isolation at times. It's important to recognize and address these emotions as they come up.
Physical health is another important aspect of living alone. Without others around, you need to take the initiative to maintain a healthy lifestyle, including regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate sleep. These habits can contribute to your physical wellbeing and support your mental health.
Learning to live alone involves growing in self-reliance, managing your emotional and physical wellbeing, and adjusting to a new lifestyle. With time, these challenges can lead to a rewarding experience of independence and personal growth.
8 tips on how to live alone and actually embrace it
Living alone offers a unique opportunity to embrace independence and personal space. It can turn what might seem like a daunting experience into a fulfilling one.
1. Strengthen your social network
While living alone, maintain and expand your social connections. Regular interaction with friends, family, and colleagues can provide emotional support and reduce feelings of isolation. Engage in social activities, join clubs or groups that align with your interests, and proactively nurture your relationships.
💙 Discover how Relationships can impact your life in this episode of Daily Calm with Tamara Levitt.
2. Refresh your routine
Living alone can give you the freedom to design your daily routine. Use this opportunity to introduce new habits or activities that enhance your wellbeing and happiness. Adopt a new exercise regimen, make time to read, or explore a hobby to bring a fresh perspective and joy to your everyday life.
💙 Learn how to Turn Choice Into Routine in this session on cultivating new habits that will add to your life.
3. Explore new activities
Use your solo living situation as a chance to try new things. Learning a new skill, picking up a hobby, or attending community events can provide stimulation, help you meet new people, and add adventure to your life.
💙 Join Shawn Achor as he explores the art (and practice) of Discovering Happiness, like trying new things and embracing your own company.
4. Create your ideal space
Take the time to make your home truly yours. Arrange, decorate, or renovate your space to reflect your personal style and suit your comfort and happiness.
5. Embrace solitude
Learn to enjoy your own company, enabling self-reflection and personal growth. Get to know yourself better by exploring your interests, and engaging in activities that you enjoy doing alone.
💙 Embracing Aloneness can be a stepping stone to embarking on a new journey of self-discovery and growth.
6. Stay active
Physical activity can benefit your health and boost your mood and energy levels. Home workouts, jogging, cycling, or any form of exercise you enjoy can improve your overall wellbeing when living alone.
💙 Try a guided Mindful Walking meditation to help you step into your body and improve your wellbeing.
7. Cultivate self-compassion
Be kind to yourself as you adjust to living alone. Recognize that it's normal to have ups and downs, and treat yourself with the same compassion you’d offer a friend.
💙 Follow along with Tamara Levitt’s meditation on Self-Compassion as part of her Relationship with Self Series.
8. Seek out community
Even when living alone, you can find or create a sense of community. Chat with neighbors, join local groups or online communities that share your interests, and participate in nearby events to find a sense of belonging and connection.
How to live alone after divorce
Living alone after a divorce or breakup can be a significant life transition, involving both practical and emotional adjustments. These adjustments often prompt a period of self-discovery and growth. Adapting to a new lifestyle and redefining your sense of self outside of marriage or long-term partnership may offer a chance to build a fulfilling life on your own terms.
Embrace the transition
Recognize that living alone post-divorce can bring big changes. It's normal to experience a range of emotions, from relief to sadness or anxiety. Acknowledge these feelings as part of the healing process.
Create a supportive environment
Surround yourself with supportive friends and family, your community, or join a support group for comfort and advice from others who’ve experienced similar changes.
Redefine your space
Transform your living environment to reflect your individuality and new beginning. Personalizing your space can be a therapeutic process, helping to create a home that feels truly yours.
Develop new routines
Establish new daily routines to provide structure and a sense of normalcy. This might include new hobbies, exercise routines, or social activities.
Focus on self-care
Prioritize activities that promote your wellbeing, such as exercise, healthy eating, and sufficient rest. Explore mindfulness or meditation to manage stress and emotions.
Explore personal growth
View this time as an opportunity for self-discovery and personal development. Consider interests or goals that you may have put aside during your marriage.
Financial independence
Divorce often brings financial changes. Create a budget to manage your finances, and educate yourself on any necessary financial management skills.
Seek professional support
If you're struggling with the transition after divorce, consider talking to a therapist or counselor. Professional guidance can provide strategies to cope with change, loss, and building a new life.
8 benefits of living alone
Living alone can contribute to personal growth and wellbeing, with rewarding, enriching benefits and opportunities for self-fulfillment.
1. Self-discovery: Without the influence or compromises that come with living with others, you can explore your true preferences, habits, and desires.
2. Independence and self-reliance: You can learn to rely on yourself for decision-making, problem-solving, and daily tasks, which can boost your confidence.
3. Freedom to create your space: Living alone lets you design and organize your living space exactly how you like, creating a personal sanctuary that reflects your individual style and needs.
4. Control over your schedule: Without needing to accommodate the schedules of others, you have complete control over your daily and nightly routines.
5. Opportunity for quiet and reflection: Living alone offers the chance to enjoy solitude. Quiet time can allow reflection, creativity, and rest, contributing to mental and emotional wellbeing.
6. Enhanced focus on personal goals: With fewer distractions and interruptions, you can focus more on your personal goals and projects. Whether it's career advancement, education, or personal hobbies, living alone can provide the space and time to pursue these aims.
7. Strengthened relationships: Living alone can lead to stronger relationships with friends and family. Since you'll likely make more effort to connect, your interactions can become more meaningful and intentional.
8. Learning and growth: The challenges of living alone can encourage personal development. From mastering new skills to handling solitude, you can gain a deeper understanding of yourself and enhance your life skills.
How to live alone FAQs
How do you deal with the loneliness of living alone?
Dealing with loneliness involves creating meaningful connections and engaging in activities that build a sense of belonging.
Regularly reach out to family and friends to help maintain strong relationships.
Join clubs, classes, or groups that align with your interests to meet new people and feel a sense of community.
Engage in volunteer work to help you find purpose and connection.
Consider adopting a pet for companionship and to help reduce feelings of isolation.
Establish a routine that includes social interactions, self-care, and hobbies you enjoy to help keep loneliness at bay.
Why do I struggle to live alone?
Struggling to live alone can be caused by factors like a lack of experience with independence, the emotional impact of isolation, or the challenges of managing all household responsibilities on your own. Feeling overwhelmed is common, especially if you're used to living with others. To address these challenges, gradually build your self-reliance skills, such as cooking, budgeting, and home maintenance. Acknowledge your feelings of loneliness or anxiety, and consider reaching out for support from friends, family, or professionals. Living alone can be a significant life change, and it's okay to take time to adjust.
Is it mentally healthy to live alone?
Living alone can be mentally healthy if approached in the right way. It can provide space for self-reflection, personal growth, and independence. However, it's important to maintain social connections and activities that support your mental health. Ensure you create a good balance of solitude and social interaction, engage in regular physical activity, and make time for hobbies and interests that bring you joy. If living alone triggers feelings of anxiety or depression, seek support from friends, family, or mental health professionals.
What happens when you live alone for a long time?
Living alone for a long time can lead to significant personal growth and self-understanding. You might develop strong self-reliance skills and a clear sense of personal identity. However, it's important to maintain social connections and activities to avoid the potential downsides, such as loneliness or feeling disconnected from others. Create a balance between enjoying your own company and engaging with a broader community to help you have a healthy, fulfilling life, regardless of how long you live alone.
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