Mindful parenting: what it is, benefits & 10 ways to practice
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, CDCES, MBA
Learn what mindful parenting is, and how it can benefit you and your children, Plus, 10 mindfulness tips to become a more conscious and less reactive parent.
Raising children can be difficult, but for some, taking a more intentional approach can make the experience easier. The mindful parenting method emphasizes presence, understanding, and intentionality in the parent-child relationship, setting a foundation for mutual respect and emotional wellbeing. For many families, it can also lay the foundation for stronger, more meaningful connections.
What is mindful parenting?
Mindful parenting combines the principles of mindfulness into the daily interactions between parents and children. It involves bringing your complete attention to the present moment, engaging with children attentively, openly, and without immediate judgment. It encourages parents to listen deeply to their children, understand their thoughts and feelings, and reflect before responding.
Mindful parenting teaches us that children's behaviors and expressions are often reflections of their emotional state. This enables parents to approach situations with empathy and curiosity to balance guidance and discipline with a genuine effort to understand the child’s perspective.
Bringing these practices into daily life can enhance the parent-child relationship, making it more fulfilling and less stressful for both parties. It's a continual process of learning and growth, aiming to create a family atmosphere where everyone feels valued and supported.
8 benefits of mindful parenting
Mindful parenting practices can have many positive effects on the parent-child relationship, including:
1. Improved emotional regulation: Mindful parenting teaches parents to recognize their emotional triggers and respond to their children’s behavior in a calm, collected manner. This, in turn, models emotional regulation for children, teaching them how to manage their own emotions more effectively.
2. Increased patience and understanding: Mindfulness encourages parents to breathe and reflect before reacting to their child's actions or words. This pause can lead to a more patient and understanding approach to parenting, reducing possible negative reactions.
3. Enhanced communication: By being fully present and listening actively to their children, parents can help create an environment where open and honest communication is valued. This helps children feel more comfortable sharing their thoughts and feelings.
4. Strengthened parent-child relationship: Mindful parenting emphasizes the importance of quality time and attentiveness, which can strengthen the bond between parents and children.
5. Reduction in stress and anxiety: Practicing mindfulness can help reduce stress and anxiety levels for both parents and children. By focusing on the present moment and being nonjudgmental, parents can create a more peaceful home.
6. Decreased reactivity: Stress and frustration can lead to knee-jerk disciplinary actions. Mindful parenting helps parents break the cycle of reactivity, promoting a more considered response to children's behaviors and needs.
7. Support for children with ADHD (attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder): Children with ADHD can struggle with attention and self-regulation, but studies suggest that mindful parenting can reduce symptoms of ADHD and improve the parent-child relationship.
8. Promotion of self-compassion and self-care: Recognizing the challenges of parenting and treating yourself with kindness can prevent burnout and promote overall wellbeing.
Mindful parenting vs reactive parenting
The pressures of daily life can often lead to quick, emotional reactions to our children’s behaviors. This is known as reactive parenting. By contrast, mindful parenting focuses on being present and thoughtful in interactions with our children.
Understanding reactive parenting
Reactive parenting can include yelling, issuing punishments without discussion, or making decisions in the heat of the moment. While it's a common response to stress, reactive parenting can lead to a cycle of negative interactions.
The shift to mindful parenting
Mindful parenting encourages taking a pause between a child’s action and the parent’s reaction. This gives parents time to consider their feelings, the reasons behind their child's behavior, and how to respond appropriately.
How to be a more conscious parent: 10 mindful parenting tips
Becoming a more conscious, mindful parent involves managing your own reactivity and emotions, so you can build a deeper connection with your children and create a more peaceful home environment.
1. Explore your triggers
Identify the behaviors that make you frustrated or angry, so you can work on addressing your reactions to them.
2. Slow down
Take time to breathe and be present with your child, whether you're reading a story together, having a meal, or simply talking about your day. These moments of connection can make a big difference in your relationship.
💙 Try this Slow Down meditation before spending time with your child to help you be more present with them.
3. Notice your own feelings
Acknowledge negative feelings such as stress, exhaustion, or frustration. Understanding your emotional state can help you prevent it from negatively impacting your interactions with your children.
💙 Sometimes it’s tough to pinpoint exactly what you’re feeling. Check out our Feelings Wheel and Feelings Journal to get you started.
4. Develop a personal meditation practice
Try to meditate regularly to enhance your ability to remain calm and present, even in challenging moments.
💙 Having a regular meditation practice can help you be a more mindful parent. If you’re new to developing a practice, Start Here with Jeff Warren.
5. Pause before you respond
When faced with a difficult situation with your child, pause before you respond. This can curb reactivity.
💙 Practice taking The Pause when you’re feeling overwhelmed to help you respond from a more balanced place.
6. Manage your stress
Parenting is stressful—and ironically, this stress can make it tough to stay mindful. Find effective ways to calm down, including exercise, hobbies, or talking with friends.
💙 Feeling overwhelmed? Pump the Brakes on Stress with this short breathing practice.
7. Practice self-care
When you’re taking care of your children, self-care can fall by the wayside. But remember, if you’re able to rest, eat well, and spend some time focusing on yourself, it’s easier to be patient and present with your kids.
💙 Check out our series on Radical Self-Care to help you build your own practice of taking care of you.
8. Communicate effectively
Aim for open, honest conversations with your children. Building trust and understanding can help you parent mindfully.
💙 Check out this session on Listening from our Relationship with Others series.
9. Set realistic expectations
Acknowledge that mistakes are part of learning, and can help you approach parenting challenges with patience and compassion.
💙 Practice releasing Expectation during this 10-minute meditation.
10. Seek support when needed
Parenting can be overwhelming. Seeking support from other parents, family members, or professionals can provide you with new perspectives, strategies, and emotional support.
Mindful parenting FAQs
What is an example of mindful parenting?
Let's say your child is having a tantrum because they don't want to go to bed. Instead of yelling or reacting out of frustration, first, take a deep breath then respond calmly to your child. Your goal should be to avoid reactivity.
What are the 4 C's of good parenting?
The 4 C's of good parenting are compassion, consistency, communication, and commitment.
Compassion: Showing understanding and empathy towards your child's feelings and experiences
Consistency: Being consistent in your rules, expectations, and responses to give your child a stable environment
Communication: Openly sharing thoughts and feelings with your child and listening actively
Commitment: Demonstrating dedication to your child's wellbeing and growth, consistently making time and effort for them
What is the model of mindful parenting?
The model of mindful parenting involves five key components:
Listening with full attention: Giving undivided attention to your child when they’re speaking to you
Nonjudgmental acceptance: Accepting your child and their emotions without judging them as good or bad
Emotional awareness of self and child: Being aware of your own emotional state and recognizing the emotions your child is experiencing
Self-regulation in the parenting relationship: Managing your responses to your child thoughtfully
Compassion for self and child: Showing kindness and understanding towards yourself and your child, especially when mistakes are made
What are the golden rules of positive parenting?
There are five golden rules of positive parenting:
Show unconditional love: Love your child for who they are, not their achievements or behavior.
Set clear boundaries: Establish clear rules and expectations to provide security and structure.
Use positive discipline: Focus on teaching and guiding rather than punishing.
Foster independence: Encourage your child to make choices and learn from their experiences.
Model respectful behavior: Demonstrate the behavior you want to see in your child, including respect, kindness, and empathy.
What is the best parenting method?
The best parenting method varies depending on the family, the child's needs, and the situation. However, a balanced approach that combines love, guidance, and respect tends to be effective. This involves setting clear boundaries while also listening to and valuing your child's perspective, encouraging open communication, and showing unconditional love and support. Each child is unique—the key is to be adaptable, approaching parenting with empathy, understanding, and a willingness to learn and grow with your child.
Calm your mind. Change your life.
Mental health is hard. Getting support doesn't have to be. The Calm app puts the tools to feel better in your back pocket, with personalized content to manage stress and anxiety, get better sleep, and feel more present in your life.
Images: Getty
