Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA

Most of us are told to look out for red flags in our relationships, but what about green flags? Explore 10 examples of these positive behaviors and how to identify them.

New relationships are exciting but they can also leave you on high alert trying to keep watch for potential red flags. You’ll want to know things like, how they treat their family and friends, how they behave when you’re out in public, are they kind and generous with waitstaff at a restaurant, or are they charming and open when meeting your people?

While spotting those serious warning signs that tell you that something’s not right is hugely important, it’s equally important to take note of the good, AKA, the green flags.

Noticing and appreciating the signs that your potential partnership is healthy and worth pursuing should be a part of any new relationship as well. So, what are green flags and how can you keep an eye out for them so you know when it’s okay to go full speed ahead? Let’s explore.

What are green flags in a relationship?

Simply put, green flags are the positive signs in a relationship. They show you that things are going well with your new partner. And while red flags alert you to potential issues, green flags show that the relationship is built on healthy, solid ground, with trust and genuine care, so you can see you’re investing your time and energy into a relationship that nurtures and supports you.

This doesn’t mean they’re presenting you with a dozen red roses every week, or never having a grumpy day. Instead, green flags are about consistency, kindness, communication, and effort — the qualities that make a partnership truly fulfilling.

Maybe your partner asked interesting facts about your best friends before hanging out with them so they could have a more in-depth conversation. Perhaps they asked you about your preferences for food types, date spots, your love languages, or even your favorite movies and books so they could be more thoughtful when taking you out or giving you gifts. These are just a few examples of green flags.

Red flags vs green flags vs beige flags

Curious about the real difference between red flags and green flags? And what about the behaviors that fall in the middle — the “beige flags”? Let’s break it all down.

Red flags: The behaviors, patterns, or traits that warn you something might be wrong or unhealthy in the relationship. We’re talking dishonesty, lack of respect, controlling behavior, commitment issues, or emotional manipulation — negative qualities that shouldn’t be ignored. When you spot a red flag, it’s time to pause, reflect, and—in some cases—reassess whether this relationship is safe or sustainable for you.

Green flags: The positive signs that a relationship is healthy and has potential to grow. Examples like communicating openly, supporting your goals, or showing kindness and empathy. Green flags are the building blocks of a strong relationship and they can reassure you that your relationship is grounded in respect, care, and shared values.

Beige Flags: Beige flags are harder to read. They’re not harmful or toxic like red flags, but they’re not the reassuring signs of green flags. Instead, they’re sort of these quirky, neutral, (or even mildly annoying traits) that don’t make or break a relationship. Your partner might make jokes at inappropriate times, try to give their best Elvis impression whenever they’re in the shower, or seem to be obsessed with reorganizing the couch cushions in a very particular manner.

These individual characteristics don’t indicate deeper issues, they’re simply part of who they are. We usually need to accept the beige flags as part of what makes each of us genuine and human.

How to spot green flags in a relationship: 10 mindful tips to build your awareness

Being excited about a new relationship can sometimes slam those pesky rose-colored glasses onto your face and it’s natural to struggle to spot both red and green flags when you’re in the throes of a new relationship. Being mindful and intentional can help you identify green flags, and appreciate your partner for them. Here are some practical tips to help you.

1. Look for actions that match words: It’s one thing for someone to say they care about you, but do their actions align with their words? Green flags are often reflected in consistent behaviors—showing up when they promise to, supporting you when you need it, and following through on commitments. A partner who walks the talk is someone you can rely on.

2. Watch how they handle conflict: Conflict is a natural part of any relationship, but how your partner handles it says a lot about their emotional maturity. A green flag is when they approach disagreements with respect, listen to your perspective, and work toward a solution together instead of resorting to blame or avoidance.

3. Pay attention to how you feel around them: Your own emotions are a great indicator. Do you feel safe, respected, and valued when you’re with your partner? Do they create an environment where you can be yourself without fear of judgment? If the answer is yes, it’s a green flag in action.

4. Notice their reactions to your wins and struggles: Look out for their response to your news. Do they celebrate your successes without jealousy or competition? Do they support you during tough times without minimizing your feelings? Sharing your joy and offering comfort during challenges shows genuine care and investment in your wellbeing.

5. Ask yourself about their interest in your life: Do they ask about your passions, remember the little details you share, and genuinely care about what’s important to you? A partner who shows consistent interest in your life is demonstrating their commitment to building a meaningful connection.

6. Focus on how they communicate: Green-flag communication isn’t just about what they say — it’s about how they say it. Do they listen actively, validate your feelings, and communicate with kindness and empathy? If you spot healthy communication, it’s a positive sign. And if you’re interested in improving your communication with your partner, check out our seven tips for mindful listening.

7. Tune into their reactions to boundaries: Having boundaries in any relationship is hugely important, especially romantic ones. Ask yourself whether your partner respects your needs without pushback. If they do, it shows they value your autonomy.

8. Look for signs of mutual effort: Notice whether your partner invests time, energy, and thought into the relationship. This could be through small gestures like checking in on you, planning time together, or being there when it matters most — and knowing how you like to receive love is an important part of this. A green-flag relationship is a partnership where both people contribute equally.

9. Use mindfulness to reflect on your relationship: Mindfulness practices, like journaling or meditation, can help you process your feelings and reflect on the dynamics in your relationship. By taking time to pause and evaluate how things are going, you can tune in to the positive signs. Ready to give journaling a try? Have a look at our 10 daily journal prompts to boost your mental health.

10. Trust your intuition: Your intuition is a powerful tool. If your relationship feels safe, supportive, and fulfilling, it’s likely full of green flags. But if something feels off, it’s worth exploring that feeling further. Being in tune with your gut feelings helps you spot both the good and the bad with greater clarity.

10 examples of green flags

Green flags are the elements in a potential partner that make you feel supported, respected, and appreciated. They’re life’s way of signaling you that you can dive in full-speed ahead.

While personal preferences are paramount in a romantic relationship, there are a few hallmarks that most everyone wants, or should want. Let’s explore some key green flags to look for to tip you off that you’re in a healthy relationship.

1. Open and honest communication

In a healthy relationship, you and your partner can talk about anything — your dreams, your fears, or even the difficult stuff like complicated family relationships, or health concerns. When your partner listens actively and shares their thoughts openly, without defensiveness or judgment, you can feel safe and supported.

When communication feels safe and productive, it sets the tone for a strong emotional connection. And if you want to deepen your emotional connection, here’s how.

💙 Use mindfulness as a tool to strengthen Kind Communication in your relationship.

2. Respect for boundaries

Your boundaries matter, and a green-flag partner acknowledges them and respects them fully.

Maybe you always meditate in the morning and they need to give you that alone-time…. Maybe Tuesday nights are reserved for your BFF, or maybe you don’t share your fries. Ever. If your partner can honor your needs and boundaries (even when the fries look so delicious) it shows care and emotional maturity.

💙 Working with boundaries can sometimes be challenging, explore our session on Boundaries from Tamara Levitt’s Relationship with Others series.

3. Emotional availability

An emotionally available partner is willing to share their feelings, show vulnerability, and support you when needed.

They might be ready to listen if stress at work is getting to you. Or be ready to hold space for you if you’re in a family emergency. Being emotionally available doesn’t mean they’re perfect at expressing their feelings all the time, but they make an effort, they try to stay present, and they respond to your emotional needs.

4. Shared goals and values

While differences can mean you bring complementary strengths, having some alignment in your goals and values is an important green flag.

You might both aspire to move to a new city, start a family, or achieve senior level positions at work. Or maybe you both love to spend your weekends hiking and camping, or choose to bike to work rather than drive because you care about the environment. Shared interests and a common vision for the future can help strengthen your bond as a couple.

5. Conflict resolution skills

Disagreements are normal, but it’s how you handle them that matters. If your partner listens to your perspective when you don’t agree on something that is a good sign. Maybe you differ on where to spend the holiday, or their idea for tightening the budget means cutting some of the fun things you love out of your day to day.

If you can discuss these situations calmly without major conflict you know you’ve got a winner. And if they can own their mistakes and apologize when needed, even better.

💙 Find ways to Embrace Conflict with guidance from Jay Shetty.

6. Mutual support and encouragement

In a green-flag relationship, both partners celebrate each other’s wins and offer support during tough times. They might cheer you on when you get a promotion at work, even if their career seems to have stalled. Or they might take care of you when a health issue knocks you down — physically and emotionally. Green flags can include small things like putting the coffee pot on for you when they get up for work. This kind of mutual encouragement creates a sense of partnership and teamwork.

7. Accountability and growth

No one is perfect, but a green-flag partner takes responsibility for their actions and shows a willingness to grow. If your partner apologizes when they hurt your feelings, or takes accountability when they forget to pick up the dry cleaning, this is a strong sign.

Being aware of their shortcomings like working on organization or time management is also hugely important. In a relationship each person’s commitment to self-improvement benefits the relationship as a whole. (Psst. Here are five ways to cope with time blindness if you struggle.)

8. Trust and reliability

A relationship built on trust is a relationship that thrives. Green flags include keeping promises, following through on commitments, and showing that they’re someone you can count on.

Trust might show up in small ways like calling you to say they’re running late to dinner, or in bigger ones, like staying faithful if you’re in an exclusive monogamous relationship. Trust creates a safe space where both partners can be themselves without fear.

💙 Explore the concept of Trust further with this session from the Daily Calm with Tamara Levitt.

9. Genuine interest in your life

A partner who shows interest in your passions, asks about your day, and remembers the little things you share is showing a big green flag. Maybe they call you after a big job interview to ask how it went, or ask how your family is periodically to stay looped in with the people you are about. Maybe they’re not super familiar with your line of work and they take the time to learn about it. Taking a genuine interest in your life is a major green flag.

10. A sense of humor and playfulness

Life can be stressful, and a partner who can laugh with you, share inside jokes, and bring lightness to tough moments is a great sign. Maybe you turn household chores into games, or find yourselves laughing when something spills or breaks. Maybe you’re able to joke about things you once argued about and these now become inside jokes. Playfulness helps create a sense of joy and connection that strengthens your bond.

Green flags don’t have to be grand gestures, but they show they care about who you are as a person. And these 100 questions are a great starting point to get to know more about each other.